Monday, September 29, 2008

What I Cannot Change.

I am being blown away by Jesus right now.

He is making me worthless for anything else but Himself. Does that make sense? If not, email me and I will try to explain a little more. Suffice it to say He is wrecking my life so much that the Kingdom of God is becoming all that I see.

Why am I surprised at what beauty is unearthed when He cleans out the closets of my heart and turns over the tables upon which my idols sit?

We (OCU Women's Bible Study) are doing this incredible study by Kelly Minter called No Other Gods. It is part of what God is doing to set me free from the functionality of idols in my life, meaning we may not bow to them, but if we worship it with our time, money, and energy, it's still an idol.

WHOA. That's what I said. I felt the toes crunch. Did you?

There's also this incredible renewing of the mind God is doing right now through scripture. My counselor (yes, that's also what I said--it's cool and I love it and I am not weird for dealing with the junk and getting rid of it--as a minister of the Gospel, I have a RESPONSIBILITY to stay healthy emotionally and spiritually in order to serve well. Praise God that we are not expected to do it alone) says that if we change our thoughts (Romans 12:1-2) then that changes how we feel, which in turn changes how we behave. So if in my mind I call a spade a spade, then I can say, "This is an idol for me" and that changes how I feel about it. I begin to see what it REALLY is, and it doesn't give me the warm fuzzies anymore. Then I pray I get to the place where my behavior is altered so that I don't treat the idols like idols anymore.

I really hope I just burst your bubble of perception on counseling, by the way.

For so long I tried to change what I couldn't and didn't try to change what I could. I am done with that. I am being transformed by the renewing of my mind. I am going to be real with myself, with others, and with Jesus.
(Some of you are like, not sure if you can handle me getting any more real.)

There are some things I can do and there are some things Jesus has to do for me. I have a responsibility to know the difference. Just like the serenity prayer...

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Did you know that groups like AA use this prayer to remind them that some stuff is simply out of their hands?

Some things are out of my hands too. And yours.

There are some things in your life you need to continue to give up to Jesus every moment of every day. He'll give you the serenity. (Not sure I know exactly what that word means but I like it.)

There's this great song that Leann Rimes wrote recently. It's really thought-provoking:

I know what makes me comfortable
I know what makes me tick
And when I need to get my way I know how to pour it on thick
Cream and sugar in my coffee
Right away when I awake
I face the day and pray to God I won't make the same mistakes
Oh the rest is out of my hands

I will learn to let go what I cannot change
I will learn to forgive what I cannot change
I will learn to love what I cannot change
But I will change, I will change
Whatever I, whenever I can

Carlos Whittaker wrote a blog today. I think you should read it. Reminds me that even under the coolest facade, we spend our time trying to change things we can't and ignoring the ones we can.

I love it that I can do ANYTHING with Jesus. ANYTHING.

What is a realistic change you want to make in your life?


Bobbi Sue said...

Learning to accept the things you cannot change is the hard part! Thanks I needed to hear this. Love you Lauren.

Elle MD said...

Lauren, I love this blog entry! I've been struggling with all things 'Jeff' lately. And you're right...I can't fix it all. And the fact is, I'm not SUPPOSED to. Some of those things aren't mine to fix. And some of those things probably don't need to be fixed at all. And I'm learning to leave it in God's capable hands.

lynZrose said...

I need to not make excuses for not doing those things that I CAN do or change.
Thanks for these thoughts. I love your blog.
We haven't talked in so long!